Birthing Better Pink Kit Birth Stories
'I first started seeing women use The Pink Kit (It didn’t have that name then.) in the late 1970s while working as an obstetrical nurse in a hospital in the States. At first, I thought that these women were just having good births and were quite lucky. Then I paid more attention. They knew what they were doing. Then I clicked….it was a system.'
Barbara M ...
'My first experience was with a woman who wanted a vbac in the late 1970s. Our hospital really wasn’t in favor of that and frankly I wasn’t either. I’d been an obstetrician for 15 years and had been educated with the belief of the day… ‘once a cesarean, always a cesarean’; however, there had also been a change to the low lying ones that are done today. This woman fought hard for this privilege. Although she did have another c/s for what turned out to be a brow presentation; I always admired how she and her husband handled their labor. She was the first one to draw my attention to the fact ‘things didn’t feel right’. In her last labor, she had never felt pain in her pubis, but this time she did. Her insistence that ‘something wasn’t right’ led us to check more closely. I was amazed at her inner awareness. She wasn’t disappointed by the outcome because she and her husband had been so involved. I’ve seen lots of couples work together, but this was very different.’
Melissa F ...
'My experience with women using these skills was in the late 1970s and was with women who were angry about their previous births. In the US at that time, women had little choice. They were often angry about what had been done to them. When they learned this bodywork, they changed their focus to how they could manage themselves even around this mine field of standardized procedures. They were great and their husbands were SO skilled. This meant that the women were just less reactive to procedures instead got on with labor. It was quite amazing really.'
Clarissa A ...
'At first our Birth Center in the early 1980s to work with women who had used this bodywork to prepare for their births. In Birth Centers often women have good births and are certainly accepted because they are low risk. However, these couples were definitely in a different category. It’s a bit hard to explain, but I guess after all these years I can say that when couples use these skills, there is more of a chance they will have a good birth.’
Joleene B ...
'As an obstetrician we see fads and trends come and go. Within our profession, the concept of ‘safe practice’ has changes dramatically ever so often. Often you feel that women believe we are out to harm them rather than protect them and their baby. I found over the years that couples who prepared with this information better managed their labor which meant the staff and myself were always more relaxed'.
David L ...
'As ob/rns we see everything, good births, horrible ones, women who scream and women who are great to be around. If a woman told the staff that she had used this information to prepared, you could hear a sigh of relief'.
'My first exposure to this information was in the early 1990s and another rostered midwife showed me the hip lift. My first experience doing it on a woman came the next week with a woman who had an anterior lip for several hours. I explained what I was going to do. She agreed then didn’t want me to stop. Her baby was born a half hour later. It was like magic!'
Fiona H ...
'This information was presented at a conference in 1990. The trend around birth has been to leave women alone to discover their own way of birthing, to focus on her emotional state if she has difficulty and as a midwife to sit back. My first reaction was to be quite offended by the concept; however, it’s come into my practice from the women and men themselves. They love it and I have to say, the women consistently birth better and the men are consistently knowledgeable coaches. I guess old midwives can learn new ideas.'
Doris H ...
'I’ve thought a great deal about this information, how it sits with the trend thinking of the day and where birth is going in society. I think we’ve gone from being angry that women were told what to do to leaving them entirely alone. But it’s more then that, we’ve somehow come up with a belief that the less a woman knows, the better she’ll birth. That’s not what I’ve seen for the past 20 years. Sure sometimes you get a great birth from a woman, but with The Pink Kit…when couples really use it to prepare….more women birth well. It’s because this is common knowledge'.
Jill R ...
'What I’ve liked about The Pink Kit is it’s simplicity. I work with couples from many different ethnic backgrounds and religions. The fact that they all understand the information because it’s just about our bodies makes it very easy for me to encourage them to use it to prepare. Often these fathers are going to be present at the birth of their children when in their own culture that won’t happen. They absolutely LOVE this information. All the women are more relaxed when they know their partners can really help them.'
Didi T ...
Pink Kit Couples
'The information is unavailable elsewhere and has provided us with an extremely positive and healthy experience of labor and birth. I would recommend any couple expecting a baby to use this information and empower themselves for this supreme experience'
Jed and Samantha
'With the knowledge provided, we were aware throughout the labor of what my body was doing. With my husband also so aware, he was able to really assist me (not stand there freaking out). That was a big bonus. I honestly believe I would have had a birth with intervention if I had not done The Pink Kit.'
Julia and Henry
'I’m writing even before I have my baby to thank you for The Pink Kit. Frankly, my husband was bored with most of the books about childbirth. He just turned off. My friend gave us the kit and from the first section, he knew that here were practical skills that he could do. We’re looking forward to the birth'.
Fiona and Gerald
'Gosh, what a change in my husband. He’s gone from feeling sort of out of the loop to pushing the midwives aside and telling them to do their job…he has his. I like that'.
Ruth and Pete
'My husband and I have only had sex to conceive our baby. I have a history of vaginismus. Even if I touch myself to wash, I have a spasm in my vagina. My midwife told me that women with this condition have c/s. That terrified me. My midwife didn’t give me The Pink Kit but a friend did who had used it for her birth. It took weeks for me to be able to relax enough to get my own finger inside, but I persevered. I started a bit earlier then what the kit recommends. By the time I was due both my husband and I could get 3 fingers inside. We’d giggle thinking about what fun we’d have after the birth. We’d finally be able to have sex! I did delivery vaginally and at home. I needed an episiotomy and wished my midwife had known The Pink Kit well enough to show me exactly where I was tightest. I would have paid more attention to that area. She had done a VE a few weeks earlier but hadn’t mentioned my hymenal ring. Other then that, we’re rapped'.
Sugi and Io
Birthing Better Pink Kit Stories From Christian, Jewish, Muslim Families:
'Coming from a very religious Christian community, we are about suspect about alternative or New Age stuff. I heard about The Pink Kit on the internet and bought it. It’s been wonderful. It’s just about my body and how I can prepare for the birth of my baby. There is nothing in the information that challenges my beliefs. It’s practical and useful.'
Helene and Phillip
'In our religion, we can not accept blood products. Those of us who have used The Pink Kit feel more certain that we can prevent some issues that might arise'.
Fiona and Gerald
'My deep religious beliefs didn’t prevent me from having terrible births. Discovering The Pink Kit was like discovering the difference between God’s help and how I had to help myself'.
Sue and Neal
'As a very religious couple, we don’t often talk publicly about what is very private; however, my husband and I have just found The Pink Kit to be wonderful'.
Paulette and Raymond
'Being an orthodox Jewish woman, our husbands’ job in labor is to pray. In our community, there are many of us who have used The Pink Kit and we call it ‘our homework’. We’re quite religious about doing everything in it, especially the internal work. We have very large families and this has made a huge change in how easily we birth and our good recovery.'
Chema and Eli
Pink Kit Stories From Diverse Ethnic Backgrounds:
'My wife and I have recently immigrated to a new country. In our country, not only were fathers not at births, often they didn’t see their children for weeks after because of the ceremonies that had to be performed. The Pink Kit has been wonderful. We’ve so enjoyed working together and look forward to our birth'.
Germain and Hope
'I’m from Papua and came to Australia. I got pregnant with my 4th baby who stayed in a position my midwife didn’t like. He was lying across my belly. She gave me the video to watch and my husband and I tried some things. I also wrapped something tight around my belly. I had a fine birth'.
Jela and Timothy
'In my culture, we have no midwives, whoever is at a birth is expected to help whether they are men or women….even strangers. If there is a problem, then we call the monks to recite mantras. My 4th baby was stuck after his head came out. Eventually my husband and neighbor did get him out and he was fine. In the 1980s I was introduced to this body work. As soon as I felt the sit bone spread, I knew that would have helped'.
Tenzen and Goba
'My husband and I don’t speak good English. We come from Japan. We believe natural birth very important. Pink Kit very good'.
'My husband comes from a culture where it is natural for fathers to help in labor so he took to The Pink Kit like a duck to water. I felt so secure'.
'We’ve moved away from our homeland and now live in a very modern country. There aren’t any older women to help as there are back in our country. The Pink Kit is like that to us…the common sense skills that work when there isn’t a medical system to help'.
Francois and Herme
'My husband and I come from different ethnic backgrounds and different religions. We often feel torn between ‘do this’ and ‘do that’. The Pink Kit found favor with both sides of the family. I wish my friends back home in India knew about it.'
Sheena and Dodi
'All my friends in Argentina have had c/s. It’s like no one wants to labor anymore. I find it sad. We’re using The Pink Kit. I’m not going to have a c/s unless something is really wrong with my baby or me'.
Flora and Carlos
Pink Kit Stories From Mothers:
'When anyone ever asks me about my birth, I cannot shut up. I had such an amazing and confidence building experience and I feel very lucky to have learned the information in The Pink Kit''
Phillamina and Burly
'Thank you so much for The Pink Kit experience. I am a true believer!'
'Wow, Isn't it wonderful what good education can do? The Pink Kit is fantastic!'
Baby Paul's mom and dad
'I did it! After 3 previous cesareans, I gave birth vaginally to my daughter. It was the greatest challenge of my life. I tell everyone about The Pink Kit.'
'I had 3 wonderful births at home with the most wonderfully supportive husband and midwife. I was hesitant to even look at The Pink Kit to start with. I've got to say, we all learned so much and our next birth was even more conscious and intimate.'
Joyanne and Ralph
'My deepest regret is that I didn’t do enough internal work. My mum had 8 easy labors and I just thought I’d follow suit. My baby came out with it’s elbow at it’s chin and I tore badly. Next time.! You never know what you’ll get, so prepare'.
'My first birth was horrible. I didn’t progress so I got induced. Then I had an epidural after many hours. When my baby was finally born with forceps and a huge episiotomy, I was relieved. I believed birth was that terrifying and that dramatic. However, it took 6 weeks for me to be able to move my bowels and for 3 years we had pain having sex. I got determined to do something about it. My midwife gave me The Pink Kit.
At first, the idea of the internal work was too weird and when I tried it, it hurt. But something inside told me to keep doing it. It took 3 weeks for that tough scar tissue to not hurt and another few weeks before I could really work all in there. Well! Between the directed breathing which I used and I stayed so calm and the internal work, I had a beautiful birth. A baby 2 pounds 6 oz bigger than his brother…without a tear. I’m 9 days after the birth and frankly, I don’t even feel I’ve had a baby come out. My advice is buy the kit and do the work. You won’t regret it'.
Heather and Anthony
'My doctor was terrified at my insistence about trying to give birth naturally. I’ve had a heart condition all my life and she told me that my life was at risk. After we talked, it became clearer that she was particularly concerned with 2nd stage and if I pushed too hard or too long. My partner and I did the internal work religiously and we knew how far the baby was down in my pelvis. We stayed at home as long as we could, until we felt that I was really dilating well. (We knew because we could feel the changes). We drove to the hospital and our son was born 20 minutes later. My obstetrician was pretty amazed.'
Anna and George
'I have a particular type of heart problem that gave concern to my OB. He didn’t think that anything I did could make a different to the outcome. Neither did my husband. I did the internal work myself. There was one particular place that was very sore, so I skipped over it. When our baby was being born, that was the only place that didn’t stretch. After 40 minutes of pushing, the doctor said he needed to do an episiotomy because of my heart. I was disappointed but knew that I hadn’t worked on that one area. He cut me and I had another contraction but my baby didn’t deliver. He reached for the forceps and I said: ‘Now hold on. You’ve just cut me, give me a chance!’ He said he’d give me two more contractions. I WON'.
'I was born with two uteruses, two vaginal openings. When I conceived my doctor told me that I was to have a c/s. We wanted a home birth. I found a midwife who would help us. She didn’t know anything about The Pink Kit but I bought a copy…anything might help. We just found it fantastic. We had a great home birth'.
'After a cesarean 19 years earlier, I believed that the doctor was responsible for the result. When we did the internal work and mapped my pelvis, I really had an incredibly small one. We did the internal work every day and my vagina was very stretchy but my baby never came into my pelvis. I was in denial about my own body because I so much wanted a vaginal delivery.
I labored at home for 24hours and eventually went to hospital and had another c/s after another 10 hours on a drip. After 6 months of thinking things through, I realized that I did have an unusually shaped pelvis. We wanted another baby, so I figured that I’d have another section but no one could stop me from laboring. We found a very sympathetic doctor. We labored at home until I was almost fully dilated. We got into hospital and I did fully dilate. Our baby was fine and the doctor told me to go ahead and push for a bit which felt great. After 40 minutes, we had the c/s to deliver our son. I feel really healed'.
The Margolis Crowd
Pink Kit Stories From First Time Families:
'I studied the pink kit and my husband was all for learning the different 'positions' especially if it was to help my birthing experience be drug free, which was what I was aiming for. Our beautiful baby girl was born after a relatively stress free and drug free labor. What an amazing experience! Go the sitbone spread! My husband was my rock, the men have to be involved! He kept my breathing focused and contributed amazingly to our wonderful experience.I recommend the pink kit to every family who are willing to learn and be open minded towards leaning about their bodies.'
Julliet's proud mom and dad
'My husband initially thought that he would just go to the hospital and watch my contractions. He didn’t have a clue, but I didn’t either. The midwives asked in my birth plan if I wanted this or that. I felt like I was going to a store and choosing this or saying no to that. My husband learned as much as I did about my body using The Pink Kit. He was able to help me all the way through labor and directed me when I got side tracked.
The internal work helped me learn about the 'inside' of my body and I'm sure helped my vagina open more easily while giving birth. My husband took an active role throughout and helped me with exercises that brought the baby down faster. I feel by experiencing a good birth, it has helped me cope better afterwards. In my birth plan I had chosen an epidural as my preference for pain relief. I didn’t choose it in labor because with these skills, I could manage ok. It was still very painful, but I chose my husband to be my pain relief and he knew how'.
'I’m very shy about my body even with my husband. Up to the birth of our baby, he’d hadn’t ever seen me naked. It was lights out for us in bed.'Having absolutely no knowledge of children, parenting or birth, my husband and I began our ante natal class through the local hospital. This class provided information on stages of birth, intervention, instruments used in intervention, tour of the maternity ward. The midwife who took the 6 week course had a cesarean birth and seemed to frequently insinuate that there was nothing wrong with this.
We discovered The Pink Kit which we felt introduced us to the fact that we could have a natural birth ( by getting to know my body). Because it came from other women and men, it wasn’t technical like the hospital information. I did the internal work myself, locked in the bed room, won’t let my husband near me. Funny, after 3 weeks, I found myself on his lounge chair doing it as I watched TV.
With the knowledge provided, we were aware throughout the labor of what my body was doing. With my husband also so aware, he was able to assist ( not stand there freaking out). That was a big bonus.
I honestly believe I would have had a birth with intervention if I had not done The Pink Kit. I don’t think The Pink Kit was meant for this, but after doing the work we felt so comfortable, we had a home birth with my husband 'catching' our baby when he was born. This gave my husband the ultimate experience he could ever have. We now have an increased awareness and confidence as parents'.
Gracie, Rich and baby boy ... not yet named
Pink Kit Stories From Women Terrified Of Labor Pain:
'I am writing this letter to tell you of my experience of The Pink Kit and how the information I learned from this helped me to have the most wonderful and empowering birth. I can say this because I was absolutely TERRIFIED ABOUT GIVING BIRTH.I gave birth 7 months ago to my first child. He was born after 8 hours of labor during which time I was able to relax and internalize the pain of labor and turn it into a positive pain with each contraction being a step further towards meeting my child. It really helped speed up the whole process with the midwife using a 'hip lift' (one of the body work moves learned on the course), taking, I believe, hours off the birth (I went from 5cm to pushing in about 10 minutes!! after the lift).
The internal work I believe also made the pushing part a lot easier and quicker (although it felt like hours at the time, it was only 45 minutes) and I had no stitches.
When anyone ever asks me about my birth I cannot shut up. I had such an amazing and confidence building experience and I feel very lucky to have learned the information in The Pink Kit'. I can tell every terrified moms-to-be that you can manage labor pain. Learn the skills!'
Blessed from day one
Pink Kit Stories From Older Women:
IVF conception and over 40:
'The learning (from The Pink Kit) was invaluable because it enabled us to undergo a labor and birth with minimal intervention from hospital staff or drug therapy.
This was only possible because we had learned how to prepare for the birth by studying the structure of my pelvis and birth canal; by developing and practicing effective communication skills for assisting the labor process; by discussing specific stages of the labor experience and how to work effectively with the breath; by practicing a series of muscular release movements which would assist any temporary obstruction in the process; by doing a series of exercises and specialized bodywork prior to the onset of labor.
In addition The Pink Kit was a vital tool in enabling us to deepen and extend our knowledge and understanding of what we learned in ante-natal classes. This enabled us to really make use of what we had learned in what was of course to be a very challenging situation.
The information is unavailable elsewhere and has provided us with an extremely positive and healthy experience of labor and birth. I would recommend any couple expecting a baby to get The Pink Kit and empower themselves for this supreme experience'.
This woman felt terrible about her first birth.
'Her mother had had 6 wonderful births and she thought she would also birth easily. The experience traumatized her. Her mother bought her The Pink Kit as a gift because she wanted her daughter to feel as empowered as she had. Other grandmothers have bought the Kit for daughters, daughters-in-laws and granddaughters because they want them to have a better birth than they did. Every grandmother who has gone through The Pink Kit: Essential Preparations for your birthing body wished they had had this information. Ask them to give it to you as a gift'.
The Pink Kit is truly a fantastic kit for women who want to take control of their birthing experience.
'It gave me the confidence to have our beautiful baby boy at home. I was fortunate to have such a wonderful insightful mother who purchased The Pink Kit when I was 7 months pregnant with my second baby.
The book, video and audiotape helped me to understand my body structure and what I could do to progress and manage my labor. I performed the internal massage twice a day for about 7 weeks and did not require any sutures this time, (I had had a second degree tear with my first baby.)
I took notes of the exercises and positions that could assist me and made reference to these during my labor, this kept me focused and in charge, I had a job to do!.
I performed 'rocking the sacrum' to help with the back pain and 'pelvic clock exercises' between my contractions. My husband assisted with the 'sitbone spread' when the contractions became more intense and for pushing baby out. I found this position excellent. Throughout the labor I also found the directed breathing so beneficial in coping with the pain that I relied less on my husband during the first stage of labor.
The Pink Kit made my birthing experience a fantastic one and empowered me to take control of my labor and to progress from 1st to 3rd stage in 5 hours as compared to 14 hours with my first baby.
Thank you so much for The Pink Kit experience. I am a true believer!'
'Yup, after seven children, you'd think you'd have 'gotten' labor. Many women just cope, accept an unpleasant experience, yet all women crave to have good births where they feel empowered by their own efforts rather than swept along by the experience'.'After giving birth to seven children I still had a fear of birth, hence the reason I went to The Pink Kit course with my husband.
Through this course both my husband I came to a clearer understanding of how my body responds and works and what actually happens to me during labor. My husband learned what to do for me, to look for signs without me having to tell him what was happening.
By the end of the course I felt in complete control and the fear had all but disappeared. I knew that I could cope with whatever happened and my husband, for the first time, felt a real part of the labor side of things.
Unfortunately, I got food poisoning and had to have an emergency c-section and my son has some form of genetic problem, as yet unidentified. But I still felt the value of what we had learned. When talking about it afterward my husband said that he felt he had still benefited from the course in that we were prepared for whatever happened. We never considered that we would have anything but a straight forward birth so when things didn't pan out we both were still in control. We feel others would benefit from this course. I only wish I had known about it seven children ago'.
Cherie and Leon T.
Fear, fear and more fear motivated this woman. She put in the work and reaped the benefits.
'My first birthing experience, prior to The Pink Kit was quite frankly a disaster. Although I had attended ante natal classes, done the yoga, swam the lengths, walked the miles and read the books. But when push came to 'push' I knew next to nothing about my own body and what was actually happening and how I could deal with the pain. Forty-five hours later I gave birth to my son, with the aid of an epidural, episiotomy, high forceps and numerous stitches.
During my second pregnancy, I discovered The Pink Kit. I was amazed and delighted with not only the content of the kit but the holistic approach. I learned so much and gained so much understanding, especially about my first birth that I gained enough confidence and self belief in my body's ability to do the job asked of it. Sure enough I had a wonderful home birth, taking only 6 1/2 hours with no pain relief and four stitches. Wow, Isn't it wonderful what good education can do? The Pink Kit is fantastic'
Many of the letters we get from women world wide who have used The Pink Kit tell the same story:
'I am writing to share my experience with the birth of my first child 2 years ago and then the recent birth of my dear wee daughter in December.
With my first, I was induced at a big base hospital with all the equipment and drugs I would need. I was 9 days overdue. My husband was told to go home for a rest and the midwife was going home to get tea. I was then left all alone in the bath with the bell. All of a sudden I was alone, when my contractions started ... one minute apart and I couldn't get out of the bath. The pain was intense and it scared me. They rang my midwife and husband to come back. I was given gas which I reacted to. My reaction was like being drunk: I danced around the room and said things that I knew I was saying but I couldn't control myself. It was a great laugh at my expense. Because of me being active, the midwife gave me pethidine to settle me down. (In my care plan I had stated no pethidine due to reactions in the past - I go into laryngo-spasm with morphine.) I was in no state to be asked at the time and I said yes.
Thomas was delivered within an hour of the pethidine, weighing 8lbs 9 oz and a 37cm head. A specialist was called in because I had a bucket handle tear in the vus. I had to have an episiotomy after birthing to repair the damage behind. I was told if I had another child I had no option; I had to have an episiotomy before giving birth. It took 9 months before things were comfortable and trips to physios to strengthen muscles so I didn't pee myself when I stood up.
Around 9 months later, we decided to have another child. By word of mouth I made a great choice by choosing D. as my midwife. I liked her natural approach to things and her knowledge and the experience she had to offer me. We talked about my first birth and how we could improve things. I was very concerned about pain relief, knowing I couldn't have it but remembering how painful it was.
D. received 'The Pink Kit' 5 weeks before I was due. I got a lot of benefit out of the breathing techniques and relaxation, but mainly the internal work, which I worked very hard with. D. and I decided we would only do an episiotomy at the very last - It was a risk I was willing to take.
I was 8 days overdue and with a wee help from castor oil, I was on my way to a little country hospital at 10:45 PM with the support of D. and my husband, and the techniques from The Pink Kit. Kate was born at 1:10 AM, weighing 8lbs 20oz with a 37cm head.
NO DRUGS, NO SWEARING, NO GRAZE, NO TEARS, NO STITCHES, NO EPISIOTOMY.
Just lots of breathing going on and a wonderful birthing experience. I can't thank D. enough, but also thank you for The Pink Kit. I only wish I had had it the first time around.'
The Fancinelli family
Pink Kit Stories From Vaginal Birth After A Caesarean Delivery:
Home birth after Caesarian via the Pink Kit.
'My husband and I were living in Wales when we had our first little girl. We aimed for a home birth and read everything about pregnancy and labor that we could get our hands on. Despite all of our best efforts and after a forty hour labor, (thirty hours at home - and an indifferent midwife) I was wheeled in for a C-Section - my worst nightmare.
We moved to NZ in time for our second baby and after much searching, found an independent midwife willing to deliver our baby at home. Andrea introduced us to the Pink Kit which we took to with enthusiasm. My husband and I were thrilled to learn so much about our bodies, how to help the birthing process along and how to cope with pain in labor.
Our second baby girl was born at home after nineteen hours of active labor. It was another painful labor and I had a lower back problem to cope with as well. The relaxation techniques we learned in the Pink Kit helped with pain relief immensely - along with a heat pack and TENS machine. We used the 'uterine lift' and 'sacral lift' together, with dramatic results the first try - my baby slipped right past the scar tissue from the previous section and came into the world about two hours later.
I'm sure that if I had tried a standard hospital birth - I wouldn't have been able to give birth without interventions or even another C-Section. My Pink Kit savvy midwife and supportive husband enabled me to rest, ea, sleep and do what ever I need to do to birth my daughter.
Our midwife and the Pink Kit itself were an answer to prayer. I thank the Lord - birth can be normal and is totally rewarding - just a couple of hours later I was already looking forward to the next time!'
Zeta and Maximum
Women feel that they are climbing a very steep mountain when they are preparing for a vaginal birth after a cesarean. They often feel that they are fighting a whole system. Much of The Pink Kit Method for birthing better™ comes from very determined women who knew they had to prepare their bodies more realistically for birth than they had previously. Often the focus was on blaming external factors.
Focusing on making your body flexible, recognizing your own tendency to respond to pain by tensing up and understanding that you have the ability to control your reflexes have given women and their partners more tools to achieve a vaginal delivery. (NOTE: Wintergreen)
'I did it! After 3 previous cesereans, I gave birth vaginally to my daughter. It was the greatest challenge of my life. I tell everyone about The Pink Kit.'
(This woman had had a previous c-sect 19 years earlier. She used the information and had another c-sect; however, she discovered that she had an extremely small midpelvis and outlet. Although she had hoped that she could get her baby out, she wasn't able to. She got pregnant the next year. Although she knew that she would have another c-section, it didn't mean she couldn't labor...which she loved doing).
'I was very disappointed after my second birth. I really hadn't acknowledged what was obvious. A peanut couldn't have gotten out of me. After thinking it all through after our daughter was born and my husband and I talking about things; we decided that at the next birth we'd still 'do' labor.
When I got pregnant the next year, we prepared with The Pink Kit just as we had for the previous birth. We just got closer as a couple. I labored at home until I felt ready to go to the hospital. I had a wonderful doctor who knew my story. We got to the hospital and I was fully dilated. My baby was fine and he suggested I push for a little while which I did. After 45 minutes I was ready. I had a c-section but no one can take away the wonderful experience my husband and I had'.
Pink Kit Stories From Fathers:
'I was right there, helping. Helping out with the birth of our son in a very real way. An honor and an experience which will stay with me a lifetime and thanks in no small way to the Pink Kit'.
'This stuff is so, so easy for guys to understand! Its sort of like plumbing; if the baby gets stuck, just move this bit here and off we go again. Very practical, hands on information. It should be called 'The Birth Toolkit for Men'
‘My opinion is simple. If you don’t work with The Pink Kit, you’re a fool’.
'I was only 16 when I became a dad. I really didn’t get it at first, but once my girl was in labor, it all made sense. We know just how to prepare next time'.
'We sort of did the internal work, but it was weird to me. My wife had a good labor until she had to push. I could see how tight she was and it hurt her. She tore really, really badly. I know that if we hadn’t done the little we did, that the tear would have been worse. Next time! It took her weeks to recover and having sex hurt for months.'
'My first wife and I separated after 7 years and 2 kids. Her births were hard and I wasn’t much use. Looking back, those experiences drove us apart. I knew she was disappointed with me, but I didn’t know anything. When my present wife got pregnant and she wanted me to be involved I had to think really hard about my sense of shame. She showed me The Pink Kit and there was no looking back. We had the most amazing birth. I feel angry that there wasn’t information like this before'.
'I’d have loved to be pregnant and my wife wasn’t so keen. I leaped in and did the work and she was sort of passive. I’ll never really understand that, but she certainly appreciated my interest, even if it was a bit much. Boy, her body was prepared thanks to The Pink Kit. It was fascinating. Her eldest sister had had a terrible birth and her other sister had had a still born. Looking back, I just think she was afraid. Her labor was very quick. We barely got to the hospital. I was trying to settle her down. She just turned to me and said: ‘If you want to catch this baby, you’d better get down there NOW!’ I did and our son just slipped out of her. Boy does that internal work, work. I just felt so blessed'.
'All the men in the hospital antenatal classes seemed so bewildered and often talked about feeling left out and unprepared. My wife and I were amazed. I felt just the opposite…prepared and ready to go. We know The Pink Kit made all the difference in our birth. In our class we were the only couple who didn’t use pain relief and 60% had a cesarean'.
Pink Kit Stories From First Time Fathers:
First time fathers don't always believe they will be really useful in labor. Put in the time and effort and you'll feel as this father did.
'What on earth is a "Pink Kit"? I quizzed my wife. And I carried on asking ignorant bloke-type questions in my mind. Will I understand it? What's in it for me? Well, why don't you go through it and tell me what I need to know?
I'm glad I got involved and took more than a passing interest. Looking back now, the thought of going through pregnancy and birth without the practical knowledge and insights that the Pink Kit gave me is a daunting one. It helped me on several levels, not least, it meant I could have a very real role to play; I could experience the birth from a much more knowledgeable standpoint and be part of it, I had more confidence and I was prepared. Perhaps, though, most importantly, I was skilled so that 'we' would go through labor together with me being able to provide some real help; not just as a hapless observer who then claims all the credit and waxes lyrical about how hard it was.
Prior to working with the Pink Kit, I was worried about getting in the way, being all fingers and thumbs and so the easy thing to do would have been to stand back and let it all happen around me. It really brings it home to me when I hear other fathers say that there were just hanging around in the background during labor because, well, that's what expectant fathers do, right?
In practical terms, the knowledge the Pink Kit gave me about my wife's body, what was going to happen to it and the baby and what we could do to prepare, was immense. We went through the kit in stages, bit by bit; the video, the book, the tape. The crux of it was, that as we went into labor, yes, I was as nervous as the next person but I also knew that I now had the skills and knowledge to draw on as and when they were needed. As labor progressed, we were able to make life more comfortable and help things along with the hip-lifts, sit-bone spreads and sacral rocks to name but a few. The Internal Work, while we had struggled with the discipline of doing it regularly at times, was time very well spent.
I wasn't the one doing all the hard work but I did seem to spend the whole 16 hours of labor telling my wife to relax and focus on her breathing. Simple stuff really, but as I came to realize, essential. Focus, breathe, focus, breathe. Here comes another contraction, focus, breathe. At times during the labor we did need to do the exercises to help move the baby down and to help relieve some of the pain so we just got on with it, as we'd been shown. Take it from me, if you try nothing else, the sit bone spread gets great results!
Had the Pink Kit not enlightened me as to what was going on and just why breathing, relaxing and moving into certain positions was beneficial, I would have been one of those guys at the back of the room feeling helpless and passive.
For me, the tangible benefits of the Pink Kit are really highlighted not just by me recalling my own experience but when I see fathers-to-be without those skills - like going into unknown territory without a map. Sure, they will get through in the end, but I found that investing a little time and effort made me a lot better prepared for the journey and what to do to stay on track.
And so as it was, I was right there, helping. Helping out with the birth of our son in a very real way. An honor and an experience which will stay with me a lifetime and thanks in no small way to the Pink Kit'.
'When I first saw this kit, I sort of rolled my eyes then knuckled under and got into it with my wife. And did I get a surprise....This stuff is so so easy for guys to understand! Its sort of like plumbing; if the baby gets stuck, just move this bit here and off we go again. Very practical, hands on information. It should be called 'The Toolkit for Men at Birth'.
This first time father had this to say about The Internal Work
'Anything you can do, as a man and husband, to help your wife have a better birth, do it. If your wife tells you to do The Internal Work with her and don't think about sex, then just do it. If you're embarrassed that you're doing it, don't tell anyone. Frankly, I just felt it was my responsibility although I didn't know what I was actually doing.
In labor, all the work we did together paid off. When I saw our daughter born into my hands, I can tell you I was pretty proud of how I had made certain my wife could open up to let such a big object out. My advise to other fathers. It's your responsibility as well. I know I'm a better father and husband now and I'm a better man.'
Pink Kit Stories From Fathers Who Used The Pink To Heal From A Traumatic Birth:
'I am 100% certain that without the knowledge of The Pink Kit we would have had a very different birthing experience. If you are a male and extremely lucky in life, you not only get to witness the birth of your child but also actively take part in that birth. I would only have cut the cord without the knowledge of The Pink Kit. Instead I worked through each contraction, painful as they were. Being with my wife through her pain and knowing that what we did together made each contraction more manageable, made me feel so GOOD. You have to go through the pain together. It's important'.
At my first wife's two births, I was expected to be there and do my part. I sat at the head of her bed and held her hand. It was so hard to watch her and not know what to do. After our divorce, I never wanted to get another woman pregnant, that's how terrible I felt. But I love my second wife ( her first baby) and loved that we were pregnant. I decided to get involved and we spent the time and did the work. We had an absolutely amazing birth, I'm a changed man. Absolutely every man who is going to be a father must help his wife for the last 8-12 weeks of pregnancy. The pay off is so big, don't miss it.'
Men who have not felt good about previous births are healed by their involvement when they have taken the time to prepare with their partners for birth. Give men tools and they shine.(NOTE: Wintergreen)
'I am writing to you tonight to share information with you on two totally different births. First birth was in a hospital; Labor was 30 hours long resulting in a 7lb 10oz. Baby boy. Went home after one week.
Second birth was at home. 5 hours active labor, boy 8lb 10oz. Aided with the knowledge we obtained from the pink kit classes and the help from an extremely conscientious midwife.
My wife and I were up to class number 3 (ante natal class at the hospital) when I was talking to a mate at work that had just had a baby girl 2 weeks previously. He asked me if I had heard of the Pink Kit. Which I had not. He then told me how he had learned how to take an active role in the birth of his child. And he beamed when he spoke of how he was able to help. We had recently found the perfect midwife and lo and behold she also mentioned the Pink Kit!
So we went along to classes that are being taught in our local area. I was amazed at how much we did not know about what was happening to my wife's body and how we could prepare for the birth of our child together. I felt that with this birth I, as a man, could really help my wife with the birth of our child.
But like all good things it takes time and we spent many an evening with the video and book and tape that comes with the kit.
At birth time my wife and I worked as a team using the hip lifts and sit spread to maximize the birthing canall and in 5 long painful hours our baby boy was born. No pain relief was given. And I found that the tremendous pain that my wife went through brought us closer together, because I had a small understanding of what she was going through and most of all I could help and she allowed me to help.
I am 100% certain that without the knowledge of the Pink Kit we would have had a very different birthing experience. Men can be of immense help in birth, when they have knowledge. This knowledge can be found in easy-to-understand non-medical terms. If you are male and are extremely lucky in life, you not only get to witness the birth of your child but also actively take part in that birth.
I would have only cut the cord without the knowledge of the PINK KIT'.
Pink Kit Stories About Subsequent Births:
'My wife and I used The Pink Kit with our first child, although I had two children from a previous marriage. We had a great birth and got pregnant a year later. We refreshed our Pink Kit skills, but more than that, we talked about how we could refine this next birth. Although my wife's first stage was pretty quick, her second stage was sort of hung up and she had felt uncertain and frustrated about the experience. We both noticed that she had spent a lot of second stage bending forward and that seemed to sort of stop the labor contractions. This is hard to explain but it had to do with the sounds she was making. It's like the sounds were going up rather than down. So, this time, we decided to pay attention to the positions in second stage.
The birth was so fast that we never had a chance to call the midwife, so we had an unexpected birth at home with just the two of us. It was great. Curiously, just before she started pushing, she wanted to lean forward and I had to remind her to keep the top of her body upright which she did. Afterward she told me that she leaned forward because she could suddenly feel our daughter move down inside and it was a bit startling so she leaned forward to stop the experience. Once that contraction finished then she could regroup and stay more upright. Our daughter was born in 3 contractions, thanks to the internal work'.
Fathers who want a vbac:
'My wife was so angry after the cesarean: at the midwife, doctor and me. She was determined to have our next child at home. The doctor had told us that both she and our baby would have died and I was absolutely freaked by her anger. How could she be angry? She felt that all the interventions from the castor oil the midwife told her to drink to start labor, to being told by the midwife to push when she didn't feel like it, to the doctor telling her she wasn't big enough, were responsible for the outcome. Everything made her angry and she stayed that way for 3 years. She told me that if I didn't support her then I didn't love her. I did love her and our child. She didn't seem to realize that I was terrified the doctor had been right and that she was being too emotional.
She learned about The Pink Kit information and did the work religiously. We fought all the time. She told me to stay out of her face if I didn't support her choices. 'It's my body!' But she was carrying my child. As the time got closer, we fought more. The care provider finally had us sit down and work out a strategy. First, she had to be willing to get medical help if she felt that she or the baby needed it and she couldn't be stubborn. Second, if I didn't feel as afraid and tried to get closer that she won't push me away
Anyway, she had our baby at home. She had done heaps of the Internal Work and really knew what positions kept her opened. She realized so much about the last birth and what neither of us knew about her body. This time the baby was 1 lb 3 oz BIGGER than our last child and slid out after 6 contractions in 2nd stage. I caught the baby, ham handed and all.
What did I think right after the birth? Why does everyone make it so complicated, it's like taking a big crap. How do I feel? Well, we've certainly healed heaps in our relationship and when we have more, I'm going to help prepare her body as soon as she gives me the nod. We both believe that if we had known this information before our first birth that it would have been an entirely different experience.'
Pink Kit Stories From Grandparents:
'To be with my son and daughter-in-law at their labor and be able to help in such a wonderful, specific way was beyond my husband's and my expectations. Oh, how we wish we had had that information. Grandparents should give it as a gift to their children and grand children who are having babies. It was magical.'
I gave The Pink Kit to my daughter after her first birth. I had had 6 wonderful births and her first one was a nightmare and I grieved for her and what she had missed. She and her husband were religious about working together and they had the most amazing birth.
'My son in law was having his first baby, but this was my daughter’s third. She wanted him to ‘catch up’ so to speak and I gave them The Pink Kit after being told about it by a midwife. I’ve become a wholesaler because I’m so impressed and I know so many other grandparents to be.'
'My daughter tells me that I’m going to help her when she has her baby and that I’d better know The Pink Kit inside and out.'
Mr. and Mrs. Greyson
Pink Kit Stories ... Odds And Ends:
'My pregnancy in '96 was text book. Better! I anticipated every moment,even the minor changes as labor was near.I began to leak fluid and my contractions were inconsistent.It being my first, I felt I should be checked.I was 1 cm and was in fact leaking amniotic fluid. My doctor wanted to monitor my contractions. Soon,I was admitted and hooked up with pitocin. Even after going to birthing classes, 6 cm with Pit was all I could handle. I requested an epidural. That was a piece of cake with a contraction at it's peak. With the epidural, I felt one side of my body mostly. I was 10 cm finally 20 hrs. later. At 10 cm I pushed and pushed with little or no pain relief. I can say that my doctor was very disturbed at the nurse about that. HE resorted to the use of forceps and the vacuum. That was no picnic! My contractions weren't registering hardly! And I could barely grip my handles on my bed! At the moment of all moments, I was being wheeled away, and pushing all I could down the hall, I would greet my daughter with a mere kiss on the cheek with my arms strapped down at my side. 24 hrs. later Kelly was born! She was 7lbs.15 oz. scoring 9.9 on the apgar scale. She was so beautiful! And at that moment I was thankful for her health. Every tiny finger and toe. I nursed Kelly and held her close. As her heartbeat close to mine, I wished I could of ran the race myself. And then it happened. Every thought like If I arrived at the hospital later.... to If I toughed out the epidural. Why? I'd like to say that I gave birth by VBAC to my son in '99 but NO! Even though each prenatal visit was preplanned for a VBAC, my same doctor was clearly not in agreement with me. He was concerned with the risks of a rupture.I had some positive comments from my other doctors,but in the end the meeting took place and they agreed that this was best. I can only say that I just gave in. It was emotional and I don't know weak of me. Our son, Alex was born 7 lbs 11 oz. 9.9 apgar score. I enjoyed their every moment and If there is any c-section quick recovering mama, I'm her! I'm seeing a new doctor now and we hope for another one soon. I'm nervous, anxious and have so many questions that need answers'.
Other Pink Kit Stories:
'I studied the pink kit and my husband was all for learning the different 'positions' especially if it was to help my birthing experience be drug free, which was what I was aiming for. Our beautiful baby girl was born after a relatively stress free and drug free labor. What an amazing experience! Go the sit bone spread! My husband was my rock, the men have to be involved! he kept my breathing focused and all contributed to our wonderful experience. I recommend the pink kit to every family who are willing to learn and be open minded towards leaning about their bodies. Hey!!