Birthing Better

Here is a further explanation why all my clients are instructed to self-learn from The Pink Kit Package pregnancy and birth resource. I was first introduced to the pink kit in my role as a hospital midwife in 2001. For over a year I encouraged couples under my care to utilize this wonderful resource. Most embraced their own self-learning and found these skills to be phenomenal and growing their capacity to work together at their birth. Most have also commented on how this kind of approach helped them so much and was not available in any other book or classes! I agree with them because I became a midwife after being a childbirth educator and I can tell you these skills are unique, essential and absolutely must be self-learned! I am now a Lead Maternity Caregiver Midwife in New Zealand where this resource is produced. I have a caseload of about 40 couples/year. I own multiple copies of the Pink Kit Package and loan one to every single couple at 24 weeks. I do not self-select. I just tell all my clients that this is what I expect of them. After all, I have the right to want families to take their fair share of responsibility. I don't want to attend lots of tiring births nor do I want to be the primary birth coach. My clients understand that and they pretty much self-select to me. Many of my clients are single mums or from low socio-economic families. I do warn them that the resource is not the flashest of entertainment because its skills! Then throughout the rest of their care I check back with them and have them show me what skills they are learning. Of course, there are some couples who get more involved. I've learned that I cannot assume which couples will take it on. I cannot assume who will be the most enriched either. By not offering this resource to only certain families (first time mothers or VBAC) or denying it to others (previous good births or home births) but to all families I've learned heaps about which families take on the skills. Families (and women) who want to know about their own body and want skills just dive in and learn. The diversity includes 15-43 year olds; low socio-economic to high socio-economic backgrounds; various spiritual or religious beliefs; first time couples to fourth time mums/couples, harmonious couples to struggling relationships to single mums; those having homebirths to those who will require obstetricial input (twins, cesareans, inductions). These skills cross all barriers. As a midwife I initially fell into a trap of thinking 'well they've already had a relatively esy birth' or 'they've got too much stress going on in their lives' or 'There are too many other health issues going on here to find time to self-learn from the pink kit.' The latter I still battle with because I really am very busy with other aspects of their care. I try to make certain they show me their directed breathing, pelvic clock, hip lift, sit bone spread and positions. I also strongly advise doing the internal work. That's been difficult for some women to get their heads around but it sure makes a difference. I'd like to share with you some of the wonderful experiences I have had with couples, there are too many to include them all but this will give an overview of the value of these skills. A beautiful home birth with a first time couple her first stage 30 minutes. When I arrived she was in second stage and beautifully in control which is impressive for a fast and therefore intense labor. Her partner was also completely in control physically supporting her and preparing to deliver their baby. Which was exactly what he did ... a beautiful 3700g babe. The mother was calm throughout, knew exactly what was happening to her and did not even have the slightest graze. Another involved couple was having their fourth baby. Despite 3 previous normal births she felt she wanted to know more about her body and have a better understanding for the birth. She put time into learning the pink kit bodywork and felt at this birth she really worked with the labour more effectively. One second time mum whose first birth went smoothly and was only 5 cm when they met me in hospital. We had expected a rapid birth although I did feel this baby was going to be way bigger than her previous one. However, her contractions became irregular and she was finding it a lot more uncomfortable than her first especially centered above her pubic bone. We discussed and felt her abdomen and felt babe was positioned too far forward and therefore pushing on the pubic bone. At this point she was still 5 cm. Although it was unbearable to lie down she agreed it would be worth a try to move her sacrum back and open up her hips to see if the baby would move backward in her pelvis and allow it to get unstuck. As soon as we moved her sacrum she obtained immediate relief at her pubic bone and within 10 minutes her baby was born! and yes, over 2 pounds bigger than his sister! This would never had happened if this couple didn't know the skills. There is absolutely NO way an unskilled woman would have been able to open her sacrum so easily and I certainly won't do it on anyone without skills. There are numerous stories like these but my overwhelming satisfaction with the pink kit resources is in the empowerment that both mothers and fathers get. They go into birth with an increased confidence because they really do understand their birthing body and have specific skills that they know will help. I used to be a person who believed birth was just something natural that we do but my own birthing experiences weren't particularly easy. The pink kit has totally changed my philosophy about birth. It is a learned skill and we just don't have enough skilled families. Throughout this resource women and men are focused on their pelvic bones and soft tissue, knowing specifically which positions and movement will enhance their pelvic space. They practice opening and relaxation exercises along with directed breathing. These women and men don't have blind trust in birth, they know labour will likely be one of the strongest sensations of pain they may ever experience. Their confidence stems from real skills and body knowledge and awareness. We all know when we have concrete skills this gives us more confidence and realism rather than theoretical ideologies. The other beautiful component of the pink kit is the level of involvement for the men. The men also learn about the pelvis and muscle/soft tissue relaxation in their own body so they are in a better position to support their partners. In working through the information together they learn a common communication which means at the birth the partner works sensitively and effectively with the woman. Often the guy will be the one to suggest the most appropriate form of support or action because he knows his woman's body intimately. I feel this creates a great starting point for ongoing effective communication in their new role of parenting. As a woman who happens to be a midwife I am so happy that this resource was introduced to me. It is so satisfying to see women so able to work with their own bodies. Now at a birth we mostly share a common language so that communication is easy, quick and effective. Not only am I more satisfied and moved by my vocation but it is also a lot easier. I would like to see this information made available to all pregnant families. This is not information to be held by health providers to be utilized as they see fit. These are skills expectant families are perfectly capable of self-learning in their own home and should be the foundation for all other childbirth education, information or preparation they do. These skills belong to us as birthing families. My husband and I even thought about getting pregnant again just to use them.

After submitting my birth story yesterday, I found a diary submission about my birth that I wanted to share also. I am 36, single and this was my 1st child. I returned to where my family lived to have this baby. I sought all avenues of support I could: Pregnancy Help Line, the 'normal' birth classes at hospital, read copious amounts of books and yes got The Pink Kit. I enthusiastically embraced that too. The plan was a home birth with all the family in attendance. Through The Pink Kit I discovered that my pelvis was an unusual shape as mentioned before ... very long front to back and very narrow across ... hmmm. 'OK-we can work with this'. I thought and was encouraged by my support people to be psoitive but realistic, work to relax my sacrum (very tight) and encourage baby downward as past due date he'd still not descended into the pelvis fully. All the signs (late, high baby, posterior, funny shaped pelvis) for needing intervention and eventual Caesareian were there. I discussed this with my birth provider who encouraged me to adopt a 'go with the flow' philosophy' and trust that nature knew best and even 3 weeks overdue was taking the safest route. Finally the Braxton Hicks which I'd felt on and off since the 2nd trimester picked up in tempo and went on for 6 more days!! Now we were four weeks overdue and my family was beginning to freak. I just kept checking in with bubs and knew he was ok and so continued the non-intervention policy I'd stuck to from the outset. My midwife had the accupuncturist come daily to encourage and help with contraction. Labour proper began on Monday and went on to Wednesday afternoon. Excrutiating pain at the pelvic brim told us baby was having trouble just fitting into the inlet. Cervix was dilating ina diamond shape (not surprising really considering that was the shape of my pelvis!) and an anterior lip refused to go down even with ice and accupuncture. Eventually by Wednesday afternoon after almost 40 hours labour my midwife called a halt --- cervix now 6 cm and swollen, fresh meconium being passed and baby still no further than just above half way point. I'd gone as far down the natural birth path as was going to be permitted! Rush to hospital, emergency c/s and Jimi-zac entered the world covered with meconium but ok. Was the information in the Pink Kit useful? Invaluable. Knowing before hand that things would be tough, knowing my shape and what to do to work with it prevented it becoming a traumatic experience and instead enable me to meet each challenge with confidence. My support people were so supportive in every way thus enabling me to cope well. What would I do differently? Hmmm ... I think take it every more slowly, probably not 'force' contractions with accupuncture and use the birthing pool from earlier on. I'd only been 'allowed' in at the end and then for 30 minutes ... it was Heaven to be in it and HELL to have to get out again ... but it did slow things down. Pain: Contractions with a rest in between are a 'workable' pain. Visualizing bubs on the other side of an opening ring of light made me 'welcome' each contraction and feel excited rather than scared and fighting it. Focus: Relax, relax, relax!! Strong positive inner voice: I can do this. I will do this.' Suggestions for others: One of the best things for me was my support team. They kept me fed and watered with electrolyte balancing energy drinks and I'd still heaps (well ...quite a lot!) of energy reserves at the end and the next day after 3 nights no sleep, 40 hours labor and ceaesar; felt good, up and walking around, energy in reserve, awake, aware and 'coping' not at all wiped out. So I'd encourage anyone to do the same. Keep up your food and fluids and make certain your team knows how important that is. Also, if you do have to be in hospital keep in control and assertive. At no stage did I feel 'taken over' or 'managed' and that was because I kept the power because I had the skills!. Decision making with me and I didn't relinquish it to the medical team once I was thru the hospital doors. That was a big factor in me accepting with peace the need for a caesarean and now I can say it was ALL a good birth. Sure, hard work, didn't go to plan and I ended up at the other end of the spectrum ... from where I'd wanted to be .. but that was OK. Now Jimi-zac is 3 months and is a bundle of alert energy and I'm just so thankful to the pink kit and my team for the input and influence they had in making this a positive experience. it would have been so very different without the skills.